THE GREAT DUMMY DEBATE

Who's the dummy?
Whilst leafing idly through the newspaper I discover that childcare "professionals" are in disaray.

Apparently opinion among those who know what's best for us is greatly divided over the use by children of dummies. Apparently they are believed to delay speech development. From a certain daily paper it appears that tensions in the industry are rising.

I don't know about the science of it but I have never found this to be the case and I come from a long line of dummy users.

Certainly my own children didn't suffer from being allowed a dummy.

Surely common sense dictates that a contented and secure child will progress faster than a stressed one.

Will no one save us from these turbulent "experts"?

We suffer the same stupidity when it comes to learning to read. The old phonetic method was proven to work best as far back as 1950. I had suffered a year of "new method teaching" and learned nothing until the head teacher was replaced and the new one announced that she would have 95% of us reading within six months.

She delivered and most of us were reading red top papers by the age of eight.

Those who had genuine difficulty then had the benefit of more teaching time whilst the rest of us developed our rabble rousing abilities by reading election pamphlets or any other subversive material that we could find.

There seems to be a simple moral here: Ignore the qualified and listen to the experienced.

THE EFFECT OF MUSIC

I'm sitting here quietly typing away whilst listening to a CD of Swiss folk music.
On there are some pieces played on the Alpenhorn.

Why does this stately instrument have the same effect on me as the church organ i.e. goose pimples down the spine?

The sound is vaulting, overwhelming. It makes me want to look up at the sky.

Why? It is simply air under pressure being forced through a tube.

Another case of the whole being worth more than its component parts?

CONSPIRACY?

Perhaps our paranoia has been revitalised by the cash for honours enquiry.
We won £10 today with the outcome of this enquiry. The politicos have been chuntering on for ages about grabbing a few more millions of money, with which to fund their electioneering excesses. What does our shiny new PM come up with? Just that suggestion.
It's all over bar the shouting. The political hand will be in the till once again. This time in the interest of the great god "Transparency".
Definition of democracy? "Government of the people, by the people, in spite of the people".

A PHILOSOPHICAL QUESTION

Here is a question which few people would ask themselves and even fewer would attempt to answer.
A taxi arrives to collect you. You are not quite ready, so ask him to "Hold on a minute", whilst you go inside to lock the back door, collect and don your coat or whatever.
Not wishing to be rude and to save time you leave the front door open with the driver standing there.
Have you been polite or have you unwittingly placed a burden on the driver? He may wish to go back down the garden path to prepare the car for you. e.g. open the passenger door, shake the mat and start the engine.
You have, however, given him the obligation to guard, on your behalf, the open drawbridge to your castle. Or have you?
I suppose it depends on the drivers and your own sense of obligation and responsibility.
Discuss.

THE NEW LEADER

We now have a shiny new PM. We are going to suspend our cynisism for a while.
The reason for this unprecedented generosity?
So far the signals are encouraging. Grandstanding seems to be out of the window. Our Home Secretary doesn't seem to be a headbanger like Reid was. Gordy hasn't yet shed one glycerine tear. He also wants government by cabinet rather than by lifestyle guru and various other hangers on. In fact I suspect that hangers on could be unhung quite quickly.
Our hand, however, is still hovering over the "Cynisism Acvtivate" button.

NATURAL SELECTION?

I came across an interesting snippet of information a while back.
It concerned recruitment for Far East posting by British institutions during the 1920's and 30's.
I am told by a very reliable source that those recruited for government posts were expected to hold a degree.
If however the applicant was being recruited for a business organisation the most important considerations were being good at team games, a public school background and the ability to mix well.
So much for the superiority of the private sector over the public.

SOME THINGS NEVER CHANGE

We are, no doubt all familiar with the European love of curry.
This is nothing new. Medieval Europeans were among the greatest curry eaters the world has ever known. No, there were not whole roads of Indian restaurants. The truth is much more down to earth.
Due to the cost of winter feed for their animals, the people used to kill them in the autumn and salt the meat.
If you have ever eaten salt beef, you will understand that after a few weeks it loses its appeal.
Enter the spices of the orient.
Suddenly salted meat was varied in flavour and quite pallatable.
All was made possible by a chance meeting between Vasco de Gama and the great arab seaman,
Ahmed Ibn Majid in the late 1490's.

AN INTERESTING DAY

I found myself in the pleasant city of Lichfield today and had about three hours to kill.
On my way to find a coffee shop I spotted, above the rooftops and quite close, the cathedral spire.
Now I'm a sucker for ancient buildings so I took a slow walk up Dam St. and over the causeway to indulge myself.
The approach from that quarter is not overly impressive and at first the dull colouring of the stone suggests that this is not a great building. Having come thus far though I decided to take a walk right the way round. I'm very glad I did. The first thing to really get my attention was the statue of Charles II. Who, after Cromwells depredations gave money and timber to restore the building.
The earliest church on the site was built in 700AD. It was replaced by a larger Norman building in the 12th. century. The present Gothic style Cathedral was built 800 years ago.
Around the main entrance are some truly magnificent statues of some of the saints.
Having watched for a while the repair work being carried out on part of the roof I made my way inside.
The stained glass is a wonder to behold.
I had arrived just in time for morning prayers, which were for the disposessed and refugees of the world and for peace in the Middle East.
After chatting for a while with one of the ladies of the church I began my exploration, which had to be brief because I had chatted too long (as I always do).
I went into the South Transept to look at the book of remembrance of the Staffordshire Regiments, a sobering experience.
Then wonder of wonders I learned of two famous individuals who were sons of the area.
David Garrick, the great actor manager and Samuel Johnson. A plaque, put there by David Garrick's widow (or "relict") as was the contemporary term, described him in human terms and was not overly flowery.
I had, by chance increased my knowledge of two great men.
The upkeep of this magnificent place costs around £3000 per day. I was surprised to see in the offertory only two items of paper money, one my own. The remainder consisted of a few low denomination coins. It makes the British, as a nation look rather cheap. It's not just the building.
It's the sense of continuity and of the thousands of hours of work by long dead craftsmen.
The current building took 150 years to complete. If future generations are to enjoy it the work must never stop.
I've just skimmed the surface here but am happy to provide more detailed information if anyone is interested.

ART

I recently went to an exhibition of paintings by one of my friends.
Not all to my own taste but one or two that jerked my imagination.
Take a look at some of her work at http://www.hannahlee.co.uk

U-TURNS

Poor old Dave Cameron. In fact, though unusual coming from me, poor old any politico who pursues a policy and then belatedly sees the light.
The press and opposition promptly cry "U-turn, and then proceed to tear the poor sod to pieces.
Surely the abandonment of discredited policies is a good thing.

HE'S GONE (ish)

So Phoney Tony's off.
Loved his speech but what did he really mean?

Try this for size.
"I've stormed in, changed the style of leadership for something a bit more presidential, led you into a total disaster in the middle east and contributed to the death of a public servant.

I've also discarded hundreds of years of history by fiddling with constitutional history and only half botched it. Whilst doing so I've laid good strong foundations for a Faschist state by carefully eroding the liberty of all you underlings and thrown millions of pounds of your money at management consultants and IT professionals.

I've managed at some cost to erode the dignity of my office by indulging myself with "Lifestyle Gurus" of dubious character and have fawned as much as possible over "celebrities" and dodgy businessmen. I've had some good hol's out of it though. Cool Britannia is going to get much cooler over the next few years 'cause I've let Flash Gordon grab whatever he can to finance our profligate spending.

So I didn't get everything right. Never mind. I'll be long gone when the cack really hits the fan so someone else can sort out all the mess.

I'll now go all watery eyed for the benefit of the numbnuts of my constituency who were too daft to see through me and are too stupidly loyal to find any fault.

MORTALITY

At 04:30 on Saturday morning we were woken by a knock at the door. The caller was a police sergeant. My mind instantly ran through the long list of things that :-
a/ They couldn't possibly know I had done yet.
b/ Were done so long ago that they wouldn't be bothered.
c/ That I hadn't thought about doing yet.

The purpose of the visit though was much more serious.
A neighbour had called the Paramedics, complaining of difficulty breathing. This has happened several times in the past. Normally, her next action would have been to 'phone us. So that one of us could go along to reassure the visitors that although noisy, her dog was quite harmless.

The second call had not been made.

The Paramedics felt unable to gain entry so called for police assistance to control the dog.
By the time they had got to her she was dead. In fact she probably died immediately after the initial call.

Now the lady concerned was not at all well off. She had not invented anything world shaking.
She didn't move in exalted circles. After her children were grown and until osteoporosis reared its ugly head she worked as head cook at the village school. She prepared excellent food for village functions and on fete days offered for sale the most wonderful home made sweets.
We had appeared on the amateur stage together a number of times, and with my wife, she ran a Saturday Drama Club for local children.

Some years ago she had divorced an abusive husband. Not an easy life, but a busy one.

Within a couple of hours the village was like a disturbed beehive.

Now was the time we remembered that a walk to the next village with her could take half a day because every few yards someone would stop to pass the time of day. She was known to nearly everybody and many of todays young managers in local businesses had been fed by her at primary school.

What I am trying to say is that a Prime Minister dies, we hardly notice. Trudy Skidmore dies and her local community will never be the same again.

Which of the two will be missed the longest?

SOLDIER, SOLDIER.

It appears that a well known UK hospital asked a soldier, who was to be treated for injuries sustained whilst serving his country, to remove his uniform lest it offend others.
Those who are likely to be offended may leave the country now. We offer them but two words, of which the second is "Off".

OH, SORROW.

On our landing, sits a rather elegant table lamp. It takes minute bulbs and offers a gentle light.
Gordon and the EU are about to extinguish forever this object of our love.
Incandescent bulbs are to become illegal in Euroland. All we wanted was a gentle, warm glow to light our way to bed.
Help is at hand however. Isn't there some clause in the Human Rights act concerning enjoying our posessions without interference by the state?

BIG BROTHER WANTS TO WATCH YOU AND MORE.

So 1.4million signatures count for nothing when it comes to road pricing?
If surveillance were not the reason for HMG's high tech satelite method, why not simply increase fuel tax?
Why must this apology for a government waste millions of pounds?
They have completely lost the plot.
Take hand guns as an example.
They were told time and time again that outlawing these weapons would not prevent criminals from obtaining guns. Nanny knew best.
Hand guns are now more readily available than ever to those who want one. In the meantime those legally held and used for legitimate sporting activity have been confiscated.
The next time Phoney Bliar visits a war zone will someone please tip off the Taliban or whoever and thus dispose of the worst blight on this country since Oliver Cromwell.
We have also got a Home Secretary to dispose of and of course an all too easily led Attorney General.
I gather that local authorities have so far spent £30m of our money training anti smoking police.
I'm sure that your local dustman will also be roped in on overtime no doubt to make up the numbers. Just picture it: All the pub regulars outside having a smoke and then unable to get back in because the bar's full of anti smoking police.
I bet that the pay will be reckonable as pensionable as well, so our descendants will still be paying for this foolishness in 30 years time.

DEATH OF AN EX-MP

Much has been made in the press recently of the death by suicide of an ex Blairs Babe.
Leaving aside that this experiment was a precursor of the sort of pressures that our government would exert on the nation, I am very concerned about the rumours concerning an as yet unnamed minister using his position to exploit her for his own sexual gratification.
His identity is supposedly an open secret in that cesspit that is politics.
If the story is true, then that individual should be "outed" without delay.
Again, if true, I would hope that the individual concerned never has a restful nights sleep until the day he dies.
I wish him a long life!

THE DESCENDING SPIRAL

Today, I shall consider a subject which should be occupying far better minds than mine.

H5N1: An innocuous series of letters and numbers.
The chattering classes have seized upon them, the newspapers are selling in increasing numbers because of them and politicians are digging ever deeper pits into which to fall over them.

The search for ever cheaper food appears to be the culprit, or so we are lead to believe.

It is my opinion that it is in fact our so called elected leaders over many years who are responsible.

We are in a spiral: Ever increasing demands for state expenditure resulting in higher taxation, an increasing pressure to keep wage bills down and ever increasing energy costs means that there is less money available for discretionary expenditure by the vast majority of us. Add to that an expectation of ever increasing corporate profits. We therefore look to save a penny where we can.

The more money the average wage earner has extracted from their pockets in the form of the above means less available for the important things of life. So I would say to the chattering classes, Don't automatically blame the consumer. Their choices are being made for them by those who would govern us.

NORFOLK C. C./ SNIFFER DOGS.

So Norfolk County Council is concerned that pupils or teachers caught with drug traces on them may be embarassed. Oh, shock! Oh horror! Better not report knife carrying or firearms for the same reason.
Whilst we're at it, don't report murder either.

The police response wasn't much brighter. "What would the officer do?" His duty perhaps, and investigate further?

I would not want any police officer to find himself in the difficult position of having to arrest anybody.

A police spokesman said that they needed a protocol and some guidelines. Now I'm sure I'm getting old. Police officers used to be noted for their judgement in individual circumstances.

It would appear that thinking for ones self is not on anymore and is to be discouraged.

What this government stands for is "Standardisation, Standardisation, Standardisation". Usually to the lowest possible level.

BIG BROTHER

So Danielle Whoever reckons that Shilpa Shetty is a dog.
I disagree.

My initial view was that Danielle was the dog but then I looked at my own (canine) and formed a different opinion. My dog is quiet, well behaved, friendly and generally nice to be around.

Danielle is no dog.

Then I had another look at a photograph of Jade: I shall probably not sleep well tonight!

How best to sum her up. Bags of money but sod all else.

In fact I feel really sorry for the sad people who watch this awful programme and would certainly not buy anything from the companies that support it via sponsorship or advertising.

Enough said on the subject.

WE'VE SEEN IT BEFORE

It was interesting to see that the U.S. president has twice ignored his general's advice over Iraq and both times got it wrong.
I seem to remember a German ex-corporal pulling the same stunt some years ago.
He went on to commit vast non-existent armies to battle during his final days before losing the plot totally and blowing his own brains out.
I wonder if the American people will witness the same ending of this administration?

The other fun bit is watching Phoney Tony's performance of Benito to dubya's Adolf.

The American people don't deserve Bush. He is dragging their reputation into the mud all around the world and earning them an undeserved bad reputation.

For those in this world who hate the present administration, I would point out that when a push comes to a shove there are few more generous than ordinary Americans for supporting the underdog

DON'T MENTION THE WAR!!

The cheek of it!!
Phoney Bliar MUST have an easy ride.
At a press conference, his minions warn the press off mentioning the one subject that the majority of the electorate have on their minds.
Just who do these people think they are?

As a nation, we are being abused so thoroughly by our so called leaders that, were it less serious, it would be laughable.

Is there an ulterior motive for keeping our armed forces so overstretched and out of the country. Is the Bliar remembering what nearly happened to the Wilson government.

I had an awful dream last night. In it a war broke out and all our spare soldiers were needed.
Unfortunately they were both busy doing repairs to their own married quarters.
Now, if the private contractors call centre in Bombay had booked the job correctly, those two men would have been available to make H.M.G. look efficient.

Yet another superb New Year's Day performance from the Vienna Philharmonic.

I keep entering the draw for tickets but each year I have to make do with watching it on television.

Still, with room for around 2,000 in the hall and 30,000 ticket applicants each year the odds are pretty long.

Maybe next year?